"IF"

Isn't it peculiar how music, a certain song, uncontrollably makes us revisit a certain place in time? Our minds just wander there without our consent.

Last night, while driving home from work, the song "IF" by Bread, was playing on the car radio. I must express my gratitude to the powers that be, because as my head went traipsing off into my past, my car seemingly went into an auto-pilot mode. That song had taken me so far away, that before I knew it, I was pulling into my driveway with absolutely no recollection of getting there.

lyrics:
If a picture paints a thousand words,Then why can't I paint you?
The words will never show the you I've come to know.
If a face could launch a thousand ships,Then where am I to go?
There's no one home but you,You're all that's left me too.
And when my love for life is running dry,You come and pour yourself on me.

If a man could be two places at one time,I'd be with you.
Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way.
If the world should stop revolving spinning slowly down to die,I'd spend the end with you.
And when the world was through, Then one by one the stars would all go out, Then you and I would simply fly away.


This song brings me to tears every time I hear it, for three different reasons, and all three, have my Dad at the root of them.

The very first place this song takes me is back to my Dad, asking me to Dance at my cousin's wedding just a month before he died. We danced to this song, and as we danced, he told me how proud of me he was and how I had turned out to be a beautiful young lady. Well... being 17 years old, and certainly not knowing he'd be gone from my life forever the following month, I remember rolling my eyes and couldn't wait for the song to end just to get off of that dance floor!
It was then that I learned how so very precious life is, and to appreciate the todays that we have, for the tomorrows may never come.

The second place my mind drifts to, is my High School Graduation, Sadly, Dad missed it, this occurred a month after his death. The High School band played at the ceremony and sure enough... didn't they play "IF", by Bread. It's all kind of a blur to me, even to this day... but I do remember crying and desperately scanning the bleachers just for a glimpse of my Mother. The simple site of her would console me and pull me through. She always did and always will.

The last memory I have of this song is a tough one. I chose this song for the Father-Daughter dance at my wedding. I knew it would be difficult to get through, but I wanted him with me the day I got married, and this was the closest way I could get to him.
I asked my Brother John to dance this dance with me, in place of my Dad, he proudly accepted and we had it dedicated aloud to our Father. It was a beautiful moment, we held each other and cried for the loss of our Father, but knowing full well, he was right there with the two of us.

The second verse was the most meaningful, there wasn't a dry eye in the house...

"If a man could be two places at one time,I'd be with you. Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way. If the world should stop revolving spinning slowly down to die, I'd spend the end with you.And when the world was through, Then one by one the stars would all go out, Then you and I would simply fly away."

After getting into the house I was compelled to dig through my hope chest and pull out my wedding video. I hit fast forward to that particular dance and just sat on the end of my bed, watching and weeping.

The videographer had captured that moment, one I will never forget, he knew exactly what to do.

With the last line of the song "And when the world was through, Then one by one the stars would all go out, Then you and I would simply fly away." the video leaves my brother and I and drifts slowly up above, to the softly lit crystal chandelier we danced beneath.
He somehow shaded the lens, which gave an appearance of twinkling stars, and just as the song says; one by one the stars would all go out, and with the final note the twinkles just fade to black.
Very creative, very emotional and very appropriate.