When is it exactly that we women begin seeing each other for who we are within?
I mean, I know it happens, but when exactly? And how much pain must we endure and or be the cause of before reaching that destination of "Knowing"?
Something struck me this morning as I drove along a back road peppered with school bus stops every so many streets. With the speed limit being 20+ I had the chance to witness something for just a few fleeting seconds which told an entire story in itself... or at least part of one, which I am trying to unravel now.
As my car rounded a bend, Cammett Rd to my right, I saw a young girl waiting for her school bus. The Young girl was Jr. High school age, no more than a freshman. She stood awkwardly, facing front, on the left hand corner of the road. She was shifting her weight from a left foot stance to a right as if trying to get comfortable. I happen to be a body language type of person, it's what I see first, so it was clear to me that there was an issue she was dealing with.
Now... before I even had the chance to get a "look-see" at her shell, her armor; if you will, her outfit--which we all know as fellow women, is (sadly) oh so important at that age, here I must confess, as I was giving her the proverbial "once over", otherwise known as the "look-see" which I am not proud of, but I do admit, I still do it to this very day. I think it's in a women's genes... we just have to get that "look-see". It's what we do with that assessment that separates good from evil - By evil, I mean separating "the mean girls" from the rest of us.
I can, with clear conscience, say I was NEVER a mean girl. Sure... I got my "look-see" in, yeah, but did not judge.
Can you say the same? Perhaps now, yes... but what about back when? Some of us had to be the mean girls right? When you think back... where did you stand?
This is where my curiosity peeks. When is it exactly, when we ALL began to withhold judgement and recognized our sisters as equals, simply as another fellow woman...no better-no worse, just like me or you?
So...as I was getting my "look-see" in... I noticed several things unfolding all at once. Two other young ladies were arriving at the same bus stop but were stationed on the opposite corner, it was clear in an instant, these girls were not equals or friends. These two young ladies showed absolutely no signs of discomfort they sashayed up and carried themselves with an air about them... but it was that stinky old familiar air from Jr High. They gave no noticeable acknowledgement that the first girl there even existed. They were outfitted to the nines and they knew it.
The first young lady standing alone was clearly marching to a different drum; her own. I respected her for that and only wished that I had seen her emit the confidence to be ok with just being HER, it was clear, she just wasn't there yet. My thoughts were...she has however, taken the first step, just by being different. Her outfit was Purple and she was pleasantly plump in her purple, she had some unruly, fire red hair and furnished a pair of black and white checked sneakers... I think a guy from the band "cheap trick" used to wear those back in the 80's... anyhow, not quite teen Vogue material-- but so very cool in her own right! I love that in a person!
What happened next is what prompted today's post. The young lady and I, just as I was passing by her, made eye contact, she rolled her eyes just as the other two positioned themselves on the opposite corner from her. I felt the instant connection, and through her eyes, I felt I could read her thoughts; something along the lines of "Here we go again! Another day like yesterday and another one tomorrow!" and I wondered if she perhaps thought... "God, where the hell is the bus?"
That eye roll just sent off a message to me almost asking "Will this ever end?" My heart bled.
I really started thinking and what I have learned over the years is that God has placed all kinds of women in our lives from grade school to this very day today and they were/are all there / here to make a difference. What troubles me this morning is... when did I learn that? How old was I before I realized that if you allow your heart to open up, God would show you the best in all women?
My wish for today is that today's young ladies learn this most valuable life lesson as early as they can... lets teach them. It's ok to have the little "look-see" if we must... just don't judge it.
