Chuckles / Uncle Bud!

I must share another few Uncle Bud "funnies." Please let me once again remind everyone, I take his Alzheimer's disease very seriously but sometimes laughter is the best medicine and I am not laughing "at" him, it just beats crying!

Most of you know the confusion that Uncle Bud occasionally has between me being his niece and his wife/lover/whatever hahahahaha. Well... Most of you also know that January will be a year since my 1st Liver disease diagnosis. He knows nothing of this nor does he know of the 2nd one...as he would only worry and then forget ... and worry again when he remembered.

Part of this whole diagnosis resulted in a year to date weight loss of 50+ pounds. Believe it or not ... this has not gone unnoticed to Uncle Bud. His comment to me a few weeks back was as follows "Hey Hunny, how much weight have you dropped?" and when I told him, he thought that was fantastic that I could do that in just a few weeks time.
~~ I only wish it all happened in a few weeks!
But the funniest part of all was his next comment

"Boy oh boy ... your sure lookin good darlin' you look good enough to DO IT!!!!"

~~ Ok this is the part where I almost DIED and clearly this is the part that proves to all of you that he kind of mixes me up with a wife and or lover. YIKES! I thankfully had my back to him as I nearly busted a gut in my attempt to stifle my laughter.

In closing, on that subject, I'll just say this... "DOING IT is without doubt OUT OF THE QUESTION hahahahahha" Let me expound on that ... first of all being his niece that absolutely just won't fly EWWWWWWW!!!!!...
2nd of all I am no Anna Nicole-Smith...
and last but not least I was told direct from the horses mouth by the man himself,

"Did I ever tell you I was in a motor cycle crash and had my testicles ripped right off--and boy did it hurt like hell!" OMG Can you believe he just came out with that? LOL ~~ He has never even been on a motorcycle in his life that we know of.
Yes they were removed for medical reasons a million years ago ... but I can assure you all ... there was no motorcycle involved!!!LOL

Then there's the matter of the little gems we overhear & have come to know in this household. I'll start with the baby monitor... I have Uncle Bud on a baby monitor, it's placed under his bed with the reception unit either mobile with the nurse while he naps or in the guest bedroom at night while everyone is asleep. Now anyone who has children are so familiar with the loving little sounds that we get from our end of the monitor, the cooing, the little moans and groans while our babies stretch ... or the little cries in the night in search of their mommies.

Well, ... this is a whole different ball game-- let me tell ya!

How does " THIS IS JUST HORSE SHIT!!!" sound at 3: 20 am in the wee-hours of the morning? Kinda makes ya jump right outta your skin... he's not even awake when he does that... he just shouts out obscenities in the middle of the night. Nice quality!

I have come to learn a great many things in the wee-hours here at Uncle Buds... for example:

We are all f*@king C*#k Suckers! ( Not quite sure who "WE" is but I can only assume I am part of that)

I have learned that "This is all Bullsh&t and he is not going to put up with it!!"

I have discovered there is always someone peering through the windows, but seem to disappear just as quickly as they arrived.

I know that each item in Uncle Buds home runs off of it's own electrical meter and we are billed separate for each item, right down to the toaster, and just so everybody knows...it costs $700.00 a "Day" just to run the guest room TV, BUT ... this is only after HE goes to bed, point is...he does not like the nurses staying up later than him and watching HIS TV. WHEN HE SAYS BEDTIME HE MEANS EVERYBODY!

The heat, thats a whole different subject, Thankfully the heat does not cost that much ...(so we are told) and it's a good God damned thing, as the thermostat is constantly being pushed up to 90 degrees. ( Just for the record, if you don't catch him in the act... this can make breathing quite difficult for the average Joe) hahahahaha. But everybody is pretty on top of it...No sooner does he up it... somebody follows behind him to push it back down. When he discovers it down he just thinks he forgot to turn it up. So up and down we go, day after day!

I have also been told that he has a "super fast" washer & dryer,He purchased them that way (which by the way he is obsessed with doing laundry) no sooner do you throw in a load, he claims it's done within moments...I'm talking 5 minutes. You can explain until you are blue in the face that it takes time to wash and even longer to dry... but he refuses to or just cannot comprehend... anyhow this causes battle after battle, one of many.

Last but not least...
Christmas morning Uncle Bud opened his gifts and he loved and admired each one as if they were made of Gold, I found that very sweet. When he was finished looking at the one in hand, he gently placed in neatly back into wrapped tissue and replaced the gift into it's tagged gift bag and placed in back among the other gifts yet to open.

~~ The end result was ...He opened and reopened all of those gifts three or four times and each time he fell in love with his "New Gift," as if he'd never seen it before in his life. It actually took moving the opened gift to another area in order for him to come to an end. It was sweet, it was sad, it was also quite funny. Poor thing!

Hey...Ya gotta chuckle!

Searching For That Christmas Spirit????

Ya know... it's a funny kind of year, and not funny "ha-ha". The Economy, Our jobs, our finances... talk about the stress factor, and everyone I talk to seems to have no Christmas Spirit, my self included. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I'm looking to be bouncing off the walls Fa-la-la-la-ing, I just feel like something is missing, Could it be I have lost my Christmas Spirit?

I laid in bed this morning and started this mind exercise, if you will. I began to wonder if maybe we are searching too deep, looking so far beyond what has already been placed before us.

Perhaps I am missing the point; point being "BLESSINGS". They are simply everywhere!! I needed to take a moment,analyze & make a mental list, "What is it about Christmas I'm missing?"



* I have been to one Holiday party which was very festive and fun, I was surrounded by very close friends which made it all the better. The theme was Chocolate and Cheese... we sat by the warmth of a fireplace, we talked, we laughed, we yankee swapped, we sampled brie's and dips, cookies and cakes & chocolates galore ... we ate, we ate and we ate somemore. ( No Im' not pulling a Dr. Suess on you hahahaha ) But how blessed was I, were we? Not everybody is blessed with a warm fireplace , somewhere somebody is freezing. They certainly are not blessed with the indulging that went on that day, somewhere, somebody is starving.

* I have been able to enjoy my shopping for those I love. I feel I have picked up everything I wanted even a few little extras for the stuff-a-bus donations, yet I hear on the news that the letters to Santa this year are heart wrenching. "Dear Santa, Please help my Mom or my dad get a job or a car so they can get to work", or "please send me a winter coat and a pair of boots." "Dear Santa Please help my Parents buy our food this year." "Dear Santa can you please help my Mom pay the bills?" The list went on and I sat, appalled to hear that these simple requests were, what I consider to be, staples of any household... How lucky am I that my child has never had to write a letter like that to Santa?

* I am hosting my annual Christmas eve gathering... it's catered. Hot and cold app's... & Every year I say, "I'm not going to overdo it" I already have. I will have more food here than we'll know what to do with. Everybody will have a drink in hand, food a plenty, gifts will be exchanged & opened. The children's hearts will be racing with excitement... and meanwhile some poor Mom or Dad will be sitting somewhere crying into their empty hands, just trying to keep their house warm as their children sleep and dream that Santa will bring miracles that simply wont be coming!

* My tree is up and as tradition goes...decorated with love. It's beautiful and I love to just sit at night in the quiet ( in the warmth ) and just admire. Each of the soft little white lights acting as a spot light of sorts to an ornament of meaning, each one holding a memory for me to sit and revisit. I do... and I smile.
This is one of my favorite things to do at Christmastime. I have been blessed with a heart full of memories and the incredible gift of life so that I am able to make more!

It was just a quick little mind-game I played with myself. I won. I found the Christmas Spirit!!!

Try it, your sure to walk away a winner too!

Merry Christmas my friends and May God continue to bless you & yours!

Peace & Love